Australian City to Launch Gay Partner Registry

(Melbourne, Australia) Melbourne, Australia's second largest city, is set to create a domestic partner registry for same-sex couples. The plan was put forward by openly gay Deputy Lord Mayor Gary Singer and endorsed by Lord Mayor John So.

The registry would be largely symbolic but in a country which has outlawed same-sex marriage the symbolism is important to gay and lesbian couples. In 2004 the federal government passed a law defining marriage as a union between a man and a woman.

"This register will provide evidence of a relationship," said Singer. "It doesn't have the legal status of marriage but it does provide some evidentiary basis in court for gay and lesbian couples."

The registry would be a first for the state of Victoria and is based on one created in 2002 in Sydney.

The announcement came only days after the state of South Australia announced legislation creating a domestic partner registry that will provide many of the rights of marriage.

Under the Domestic Partners Bill, introduced in the state Parliament on Tuesday (story), any two people who live together as a couple will be covered. It also would allow siblings or other couplings to register.

Attorney-General Michael Atkinson said that he expects the bill will have little difficulty in passing. The opposition parties have announced their backing for the bill.

The legislation would allow same and opposite-sex couples to register and be able to share financial affairs, make medical and funeral arrangements for one another.

Earlier this year the Australian Capital Territory passed legislation giving same-sex couples most of the rights of marriage (story) but the bill was overturned by the federal government.
Atkinson said that he did not expect his bill would meet opposition from the federal government because it recognizes the relationships between all types of interdependent couples.

Following the rejection of the ACT legislation the federal Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission began an investigation into inequities faced by same-sex couples. The commission has been holding hearings across the country. (story)

Public opinion has been slowly shifting in favor of recognizing same-sex relationships and Prime Minister John Howard now has suggested his government may look at ways of granting limited recognition to same-sex couples. But Howard said he has no intention of repealing the ban on gay marriage.

©365Gay.com 2006

I think it's great that this registry passed. But at the same time, if you read the article, it states it's open for str8 couples, and siblings...uhhhh, what??? The fact that they want to label it as a "gay partner registry" and then adding the component that str8 couples and siblings can be part of the registry...isn't that a bit odd?

Str8 couples can get married, and any documentation they provide, can prove they are a couple. If a male/female couple go to a hospital, there isn't any question about anything. But when two people of the same gender go to the hospital, a lot of times, the other partner isn't allowed. And unless there is legal documentation saying "so and so" has permission, it's void.

And the whole siblings thing?? That seriously offends me..to label something as a gay registry, but to include siblings? Am I reading this right? I thought the main purpose of the gay partner registry, was for same sex couples to be able to have their relationship recognized. NO, it doesn't mean that they are married, but there it is a legal recognition of a relationship. If there is the gay partner registry, the couple will be able to make financial, and medical decisions, among other things, without worrying about being taken seriously.

Howard will never approve of gay marriages, but with the way things are going..who knows, he may be booted out of office next election, which is next year. ::crossing fingers that something changes::

Researchers seek routes to happier life

By MALCOLM RITTER, AP Science Writer Sun Nov 26, 6:23 PM ET

NEW YORK - As a motivational speaker and executive coach, Caroline Adams Miller knows a few things about using mental exercises to achieve goals. But last year, one exercise she was asked to try took her by surprise.

Every night, she was to think of three good things that happened that day and analyze why they occurred. That was supposed to increase her overall happiness.

"I thought it was too simple to be effective," said Miller, 44, of Bethesda. Md. "I went to Harvard. I'm used to things being complicated."

Miller was assigned the task as homework in a master's degree program. But as a chronic worrier, she knew she could use the kind of boost the exercise was supposed to deliver.

She got it.

"The quality of my dreams has changed, I never have trouble falling asleep and I do feel happier," she said.

Results may vary, as they say in the weight-loss ads. But that exercise is one of several that have shown preliminary promise in recent research into how people can make themselves happier — not just for a day or two, but long-term. It's part of a larger body of work that challenges a long-standing skepticism about whether that's even possible.

There's no shortage of advice in how to become a happier person, as a visit to any bookstore will demonstrate. In fact, Martin Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania and colleagues have collected more than 100 specific recommendations, ranging from those of the Buddha through the self-improvement industry of the 1990s.

The problem is, most of the books on store shelves aren't backed up by rigorous research, says Sonja Lyubomirsky, a psychologist at the University of California, Riverside, who's conducting such studies now. (She's also writing her own book).

In fact, she says, there has been very little research in how people become happier.

Why? The big reason, she said, is that many researchers have considered that quest to be futile.

For decades, a widely accepted view has been that people are stuck with a basic setting on their happiness thermostat. It says the effects of good or bad life events like marriage, a raise, divorce, or disability will simply fade with time.

We adapt to them just like we stop noticing a bad odor from behind the living room couch after a while, this theory says. So this adaptation would seem to doom any deliberate attempt to raise a person's basic happiness setting.

As two researchers put it in 1996, "It may be that trying to be happier is as futile as trying to be taller."

But recent long-term studies have revealed that the happiness thermostat is more malleable than the popular theory maintained, at least in its extreme form. "Set-point is not destiny," says psychologist Ed Diener of the University of Illinois.

One new study showing change in happiness levels followed thousands of Germans for 17 years. It found that about a quarter changed significantly over that time in their basic level of satisfaction with life. (That's a popular happiness measure; some studies sample how one feels through the day instead.) Nearly a tenth of the German participants changed by three points or more on a 10-point scale.

Other studies show an effect of specific life events, though of course the results are averages and can't predict what will happen to particular individuals. Results show long-lasting shadows associated with events like serious disability, divorce, widowhood, and getting laid off.

The boost from getting married, on the other hand, seems to dissipate after about two years, says psychologist Richard E. Lucas of Michigan State University.

What about the joys of having children? Parents recall those years with fondness, but studies show childrearing takes a toll on marital satisfaction, Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert notes in his recent book, "Stumbling on Happiness." Parents gain in satisfaction as their kids leave home, he said.

"Despite what we read in the popular press," he writes, "the only known symptom of 'empty nest syndrome' is increased smiling."

Gilbert says people are awful at predicting what will make them happy. Yet, Lucas says, "most people are happy most of the time." That is, in a group of people who have reasonably good health and income, most will probably rate a 7.5 or so on a happiness scale of zero to 10, he says.

Still, many people want to be happier. What can they do? That's where research by Lyubomirsky, Seligman and others comes in.

The think-of-three-good-things exercise that Miller, the motivational speaker, found so simplistic at first is among those being tested by Seligman's group at the University of Pennsylvania.

People keep doing it on their own because it's immediately rewarding, said Seligman colleague Acacia Parks. It makes people focus more on good things that happen, which might otherwise be forgotten because of daily disappointments, she said.

Miller said the exercise made her notice more good things in her day, and that now she routinely lists 10 or 20 of them rather than just three.

A second approach that has shown promise in Seligman's group has people discover their personal strengths through a specialized questionnaire and choose the five most prominent ones. Then, every day for a week, they are to apply one or more of their strengths in a new way.

Strengths include things like the ability to find humor or summon enthusiasm, appreciation of beauty, curiosity and love of learning. The idea of the exercise is that using one's major "signature" strengths may be a good way to get engaged in satisfying activities.

These two exercises were among five tested on more than 500 people who'd visited a Web site called "Authentic Happiness." Seligman and colleagues reported last year that the two exercises increased happiness and reduced depressive symptoms for the six months that researchers tracked the participants. The effect was greater for people who kept doing the exercises frequently. A followup study has recently begun.

Another approach under study now is having people work on savoring the pleasing things in their lives like a warm shower or a good breakfast, Parks said. Yet another promising approach is having people write down what they want to be remembered for, to help them bring their daily activities in line with what's really important to them, she said.

Lyubomirsky, meanwhile, is testing some other simple strategies. "This is not rocket science," she said.

For example, in one experiment, participants were asked to regularly practice random acts of kindness, things like holding a door open for a stranger or doing a roommate's dishes, for 10 weeks. The idea was to improve a person's self-image and promote good interactions with other people.

Participants who performed a variety of acts, rather than repeating the same ones, showed an increase in happiness even a month after the experiment was concluded. Those who kept on doing the acts on their own did better than those who didn't.

Other approaches she has found some preliminary promise for include thinking about the happiest day in your life over and over again, without analyzing it, and writing about how you'll be 10 years from now, assuming everything goes just right.

Some strategies appear to work better for some people than others, so it's important to get the right fit, she said.

But it'll take more work to see just how long the happiness boost from all these interventions actually lasts, with studies tracking people for many months or years, Lyubomirsky said.

Any long-term effect will probably depend on people continuing to work at it, just as folks who move to southern California can lose their appreciation of the ocean and weather unless they pursue activities that highlight those natural benefits, she said.

In fact, Diener says, happiness probably is really about work and striving.

"Happiness is the process, not the place," he said via e-mail. "So many of us think that when we get everything just right, and obtain certain goals and circumstances, everything will be in place and we will be happy.... But once we get everything in place, we still need new goals and activities. The Princess could not just stop when she got the Prince."

I thought this was a really interesting article. As a pessimist, I am always trying to find ways to not be so pessimistic. I know that my negative ideas and attitudes, is what can bring me down a lot of the time. I can't help but feel pessimistic, even when I know things are going well. It just seems sencond nature to me, to think that something bad is going to happen, or already think bad thoughts.

I definitely feel like my lack of positive attitude and positive thinking, is what makes me more stressed, and makes me feel like I'm not living the happy life I would like. Don't get me wrong, I'm not unhappy, but I know that there are a lot more happier people out there. Other people just seem to find a way to always find the good in people, and/or situations.

For me, that's hard to do. I've always been extremely hard on myself, and always sense and identifying the bad in people and situations. I often think about what my life would have turned out, had I been more optimistic and positive about my surroundings. I know that I'm doing quite well, compared to others. But at the same time, I know that I could be far better off, if I tried.

So here is my task for the night....3 good things that happened today, and analyze why they occurred.

1) My kitty Charlie lost her collar. The collar she always seems to manage to pull off. The good thing is, I found it. I found it, even though I was in a rush this morning. I knew that my partner would probably be peeved off at the cat, for losing the collar AGAIN. So just before I was ready to walk out the door, I thought I'd take a quick glance outside. And lo and behold, it was lying next to the Asian statue.

Even though I wrote a letter to my partner to let her know I found it, she managed to get another one. But I felt proud that I had found it, considering it could have been anywhere. And I could have been my partner, and just didn't even consider looking. But I did, and I found it...so we have a spare.

2) I didn't get any new files today. That is definitely a good thing that happened today. As for the reason, well, Mondays are usually quiet days, in regards to getting new VCAT orders. But I know that I will probably get a few tomorrow (not being pessimistic), but I was happy that I did not get any today. I was able to concentrate on the work that I already had, and not have to worry about starting up another file. I know when I get a new file, a small tick goes inside of my head, and I start to worry and think about all the information that I need to gather. But today, was a good day..I didn't receive any new files.

3) I wasn't going to go to the division Christmas party. I had it in my head that I didn't want to go. Even though I work with everyone in the division, I don't know a lot of people, and I am not really a social butterfly. But a co-worker of mine, persuaded me to go on Friday. I was adament about not going, but she too, is not into drinking or socializing. But she persuaded me to go, and told me, that we'd leave together. I was a bit hesitant about going for the simple fact, that I don't like riding the train late at night. And I'll most likely have to work on Saturday. But my co-workers smooth words and persuasions, told myself to go and have a good time. So I'm going to.

Reason why the third good thing happened, well, I felt like this co-worker wanted me to go. I felt sort of wanted (in a strange, non-sexual way). I felt like someone wanted me to go....that way I'd be able to socialize.