Anniversary
Today is the 6 year anniversary that my partner and I have been together. 6 LONG years, I would think. But at the same time, the 6 years have flown by so quickly. Maybe it seems like it’s been a long time because we’ve been through so much. But even though it’s been 6 years since we decided to give the relationship a go, I can still remember so clearly the moment my partner asked me if I’d be her girlfriend. The whole experience was mind blogging, and as I sit here and reminisce about it, I can’t help but smile. Smile and be proud of how much has been achieved by the both of us, during the past 6 years.
We were on our way to Silver Creek Falls the day my partner “asked.”. I was driving, and thinking about the morning that I had just been through. LONG story short, I ended up breaking up with my online girlfriend, to be with my partner. Wasn’t the most kosher way to break up, but I had to take a leap of faith with my partner. And I wasn’t going to do that, until I was “free” to do so. But we were driving and she looked over at me and said “I don’t know what the future holds, but I know what my feelings are for you. I know that I love you, and I want to be with you. How would you feel about having a go at a long distance relationship?” I said that I had some hesitations, just for the fact that I was in Oregon, she was in Australia. But I agreed to it happily. We even talked about having an open relationship, just because we didn’t know what how things would eventuate. We of course ended the open relationship as soon as it started pretty much. We knew that we wanted to only be with each other and we’d wait as long as we had to.
I think what made the day even more special, was the actual date of the day. My partner, way before I came into the picture, met a wonderful man, and was engaged to him. The date that they got engaged, was the 19th of December. Of course, it was a different year, but it had a special meaning then, and it did again in 1999. They got engaged December of 1993 I believe. Then in March of 1994, her fiance suddenly passed away. He died in his sleep, and fortunately for her, she was not in the same bed, or the same house. I think that would have been far more scarring for my partner, had she been around. She doesn’t talk much about him, for he’s in the past. But I take the fact that my partner asked me to be her girlfriend on the same day he asked her to be his lifelong partner..I take that as a good omen. As an omen that this kind man is watching her, and puts trust in me to make her happy.
I often wonder, and ask my partner how she would have thought her life would have panned out, had her fiance not have died. She doesn’t know, and she doesn’t like think about it. She does know that she’s happy now. And in a twisted sort of way, she secretly is thankful that things happened the way they did. She’d had “tendencies” before she got involved with any women, but societal pressures, had her leaning toward marrying a guy. Doesn’t mean she didn’t love him, but she always knew that deep inside, she wanted to be with women. But like I said, she’s happy.
Every anniversary that goes by, I stop and ponder upon the idea of whether her fiance is looking over us and is pleased with how things turned out. But I know how happy my partner has made me. I think about all the ups and downs we have been through. I think about all the people in my past who told me “your relationship isn’t going to work out.” Or even “how can you call this a relationship?” But look at us now, 6 years on, and my partner and I are finally able to be where we’ve wanted to be.
I hear about other gay couples who have been together longer and I can’t help but feel a sense of happiness for them. That isn’t to discredit people who haven’t been together a long time. Some may say that 6 years isn’t a long time, but some may say 3 years is a long time. To me, anything after 5 years is a long time to be with someone. And I so praise and commend people who have been together longer than that. But sometimes I worry. I hear about people who have been together for 10 years, 15 years, and they end up breaking up. It breaks my heart, and worries me at times. But I know that I can’t compare my relationship and my happiness to those other people. There may well have been mitigating circumstances that I don’t know about to have caused the breakup. But I get a big sense of pride and joy when I tell others how long I’ve been with my partner. We’ve endured so much, and the way that we met…it’s just such a wonderful thing, when I think about it. I don’t know what the future holds for me, but I know, right now..in this time and place, there isn’t anyone I’d rather be with.
-current mood-ITCHY, I was outside and bugs were at me..yuck
We were on our way to Silver Creek Falls the day my partner “asked.”. I was driving, and thinking about the morning that I had just been through. LONG story short, I ended up breaking up with my online girlfriend, to be with my partner. Wasn’t the most kosher way to break up, but I had to take a leap of faith with my partner. And I wasn’t going to do that, until I was “free” to do so. But we were driving and she looked over at me and said “I don’t know what the future holds, but I know what my feelings are for you. I know that I love you, and I want to be with you. How would you feel about having a go at a long distance relationship?” I said that I had some hesitations, just for the fact that I was in Oregon, she was in Australia. But I agreed to it happily. We even talked about having an open relationship, just because we didn’t know what how things would eventuate. We of course ended the open relationship as soon as it started pretty much. We knew that we wanted to only be with each other and we’d wait as long as we had to.
I think what made the day even more special, was the actual date of the day. My partner, way before I came into the picture, met a wonderful man, and was engaged to him. The date that they got engaged, was the 19th of December. Of course, it was a different year, but it had a special meaning then, and it did again in 1999. They got engaged December of 1993 I believe. Then in March of 1994, her fiance suddenly passed away. He died in his sleep, and fortunately for her, she was not in the same bed, or the same house. I think that would have been far more scarring for my partner, had she been around. She doesn’t talk much about him, for he’s in the past. But I take the fact that my partner asked me to be her girlfriend on the same day he asked her to be his lifelong partner..I take that as a good omen. As an omen that this kind man is watching her, and puts trust in me to make her happy.
I often wonder, and ask my partner how she would have thought her life would have panned out, had her fiance not have died. She doesn’t know, and she doesn’t like think about it. She does know that she’s happy now. And in a twisted sort of way, she secretly is thankful that things happened the way they did. She’d had “tendencies” before she got involved with any women, but societal pressures, had her leaning toward marrying a guy. Doesn’t mean she didn’t love him, but she always knew that deep inside, she wanted to be with women. But like I said, she’s happy.
Every anniversary that goes by, I stop and ponder upon the idea of whether her fiance is looking over us and is pleased with how things turned out. But I know how happy my partner has made me. I think about all the ups and downs we have been through. I think about all the people in my past who told me “your relationship isn’t going to work out.” Or even “how can you call this a relationship?” But look at us now, 6 years on, and my partner and I are finally able to be where we’ve wanted to be.
I hear about other gay couples who have been together longer and I can’t help but feel a sense of happiness for them. That isn’t to discredit people who haven’t been together a long time. Some may say that 6 years isn’t a long time, but some may say 3 years is a long time. To me, anything after 5 years is a long time to be with someone. And I so praise and commend people who have been together longer than that. But sometimes I worry. I hear about people who have been together for 10 years, 15 years, and they end up breaking up. It breaks my heart, and worries me at times. But I know that I can’t compare my relationship and my happiness to those other people. There may well have been mitigating circumstances that I don’t know about to have caused the breakup. But I get a big sense of pride and joy when I tell others how long I’ve been with my partner. We’ve endured so much, and the way that we met…it’s just such a wonderful thing, when I think about it. I don’t know what the future holds for me, but I know, right now..in this time and place, there isn’t anyone I’d rather be with.
-current mood-ITCHY, I was outside and bugs were at me..yuck
posted by Gaylicious© at Monday, December 19, 2005
1 Comments:
Happy anniversary... and how very poignant of your partner... I wish you both many years to come!!
BTW- how did you and your partner meet??
~Lb:)
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