Staying positive
Do people find it hard to stay positive, when in fact it seems impossible to do such? People can tell me to stay positive, that everything will work out. But until they’ve been in the actual situation, they really can’t know. People tell me that our love will get us through, and that I need to find some solace, if that’s even possible. I’m always trying to think that our love will get us through, I try to find solace, but it all reverts back to me thinking of the worst. But there IS strength in serenity, and I’m trying so hard to find the strength to stay positive.
My mum says that what I’ve been experiencing is depression, she’s been through it, and I’m going through it right now. She tells me I need to keep my health up by taking vitamins, and other natural herbal remedies. Watching tv, or just having noise around, it may seem mundane, but she says it helps. I know I’m depressed, and stressed, but I also know that I need to still be able to live somewhat of a life, as she says. It may seem like it’s impossible to do, with how much is going on in our lives. I have to keep telling myself that I’m doing this for my partner. I need to stay strong and positive, because I know she needs to have some positive efforts in her life. She can only be positive for so long, but she too, needs a support system.
People tell me that I should have looked further into our situation before I made the trip to Australia. But I DID do my research. I researched this for 2 years, before I finally made the decision to move. I arrived on a 4 month working holiday visa, and I knew that I needed to apply for a 6 month tourist visa. I did just that, but when I found out information about getting the extension, that is where the major hiccup happened. I rang DIMIA and asked them about the multiple travel condition. I had options, that if I couldn’t have done that, I had an option if I had found at when I came back from NZ that my visa extension wasn’t going to go thru. Like I told our case officer, I run the scenario a thousand times in my head, and I didn’t think I needed an immigration lawyer. I’ve known many couples who have gone thru this process without one, and they made it okay.
I know immigration is complicated, and very daunting, that’s why I did my research. I thought I did it to the full extent that I could have. I made assumptions that once a visa expires, that it’s void and is no longer in the picture. Obviously that isn’t the case, and I KNOW that now. DIMIA knows that people have to find ways to get the 12 months together, they also know that many couples go to NZ to get the new visas to stay. DIMIA knows all of this, and it wasn’t as thou I was being deceitful intentionally. I couldn’t just flat out tell DIMIA that I had plans of staying permanently to Australia, I couldn’t have done that without a visa that fit that criteria, and there just isn’t one. I’m at fault, DIMIA is at fault, everyone is at fault to a certain extent. But at the same time, we’re all NOT at fault, if that even make sense. I can’t be running negative thoughts into my head and thinking “if I had only gotten an immigration lawyer” I can’t be thinking “if I had only researched more” or any thing that is negative. It’s only going to bring me down, and it’s going to add more stress to me. What good is it for me to be thinking all these negative thoughts when what is done is done? Yes, sure maybe I should have done ALL of my research, to the full extent of the law, but I didn’t think I needed to. I thought I had all the information I needed. And it all boils down to many misunderstandings. I know it, my partner knows it, other people know it. It’s now just a matter of proving to DIMIA and our case officer, that my partner and I deserve to be together, despite me being illegal for as long as I did.
I know that running scenarios through my head isn’t going to get me anywhere. Even when we talk to other people about it, they start getting thougths in my head, and it makes me think that I AM more at fault. But what is done, is done, and all I can hope for and think about, is that there will be some compassion in the person that ultimately makes us or breaks us. But keeping busy will help me, being around other people will help me as well. But how long is this going to take, before I will be able to be by myself and be okay with it? I’m staying positive, I am, I am. All good will come out of this, let’s just think of this as another test to prove just how committed my partner and I are to each other. And I’d so much appreciate it, if I kept getting those sort of feedback from others. I know people are thinking realistically, so am I. But I can’t go back in time and get myself a lawyer, I can’t go back in time and change things. All I can do is wait, pray, and hope that God is on our side.
-current mood-MORE STRESSED, because of what some people have been telling me I SHOULD have done. DOI, I know what I should have done. But what is done is done, I can't change what I did, or didn't do.
My mum says that what I’ve been experiencing is depression, she’s been through it, and I’m going through it right now. She tells me I need to keep my health up by taking vitamins, and other natural herbal remedies. Watching tv, or just having noise around, it may seem mundane, but she says it helps. I know I’m depressed, and stressed, but I also know that I need to still be able to live somewhat of a life, as she says. It may seem like it’s impossible to do, with how much is going on in our lives. I have to keep telling myself that I’m doing this for my partner. I need to stay strong and positive, because I know she needs to have some positive efforts in her life. She can only be positive for so long, but she too, needs a support system.
People tell me that I should have looked further into our situation before I made the trip to Australia. But I DID do my research. I researched this for 2 years, before I finally made the decision to move. I arrived on a 4 month working holiday visa, and I knew that I needed to apply for a 6 month tourist visa. I did just that, but when I found out information about getting the extension, that is where the major hiccup happened. I rang DIMIA and asked them about the multiple travel condition. I had options, that if I couldn’t have done that, I had an option if I had found at when I came back from NZ that my visa extension wasn’t going to go thru. Like I told our case officer, I run the scenario a thousand times in my head, and I didn’t think I needed an immigration lawyer. I’ve known many couples who have gone thru this process without one, and they made it okay.
I know immigration is complicated, and very daunting, that’s why I did my research. I thought I did it to the full extent that I could have. I made assumptions that once a visa expires, that it’s void and is no longer in the picture. Obviously that isn’t the case, and I KNOW that now. DIMIA knows that people have to find ways to get the 12 months together, they also know that many couples go to NZ to get the new visas to stay. DIMIA knows all of this, and it wasn’t as thou I was being deceitful intentionally. I couldn’t just flat out tell DIMIA that I had plans of staying permanently to Australia, I couldn’t have done that without a visa that fit that criteria, and there just isn’t one. I’m at fault, DIMIA is at fault, everyone is at fault to a certain extent. But at the same time, we’re all NOT at fault, if that even make sense. I can’t be running negative thoughts into my head and thinking “if I had only gotten an immigration lawyer” I can’t be thinking “if I had only researched more” or any thing that is negative. It’s only going to bring me down, and it’s going to add more stress to me. What good is it for me to be thinking all these negative thoughts when what is done is done? Yes, sure maybe I should have done ALL of my research, to the full extent of the law, but I didn’t think I needed to. I thought I had all the information I needed. And it all boils down to many misunderstandings. I know it, my partner knows it, other people know it. It’s now just a matter of proving to DIMIA and our case officer, that my partner and I deserve to be together, despite me being illegal for as long as I did.
I know that running scenarios through my head isn’t going to get me anywhere. Even when we talk to other people about it, they start getting thougths in my head, and it makes me think that I AM more at fault. But what is done, is done, and all I can hope for and think about, is that there will be some compassion in the person that ultimately makes us or breaks us. But keeping busy will help me, being around other people will help me as well. But how long is this going to take, before I will be able to be by myself and be okay with it? I’m staying positive, I am, I am. All good will come out of this, let’s just think of this as another test to prove just how committed my partner and I are to each other. And I’d so much appreciate it, if I kept getting those sort of feedback from others. I know people are thinking realistically, so am I. But I can’t go back in time and get myself a lawyer, I can’t go back in time and change things. All I can do is wait, pray, and hope that God is on our side.
-current mood-MORE STRESSED, because of what some people have been telling me I SHOULD have done. DOI, I know what I should have done. But what is done is done, I can't change what I did, or didn't do.
posted by Gaylicious© at Sunday, October 16, 2005
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