Threesomes

The past few weeks, the topic of threesomes has come up on many occassions. I myself am not a believer nor am I a participant in them. And I don’t really associate myself with such people. However, I give the people the benefit of the doubt, and if their life doesn’t revolve around them, I’m more than happy to talk about other things. I’ve met some great ladies who either dab into the threesome lifestyle or have had talk about it (threesome including only women of course). And in one way or another, I’m interested in finding out just why someone would choose to participate in this sort of thing.

I don’t care to associate myself around women who are married, or have boyfriends and think that just because they’re bisexual, that they can go and bed hop, and that I want to be a part of it. Being a lesbian means liking women, doesn’t it? Where in the “manual” does it say “just as long as there is a woman in the bedroom, it’s still okay for a guy to be present?” Nah, doesn’t say that anywhere. And I get really ticked off and annoyed when women message me and tell me “I’m married but bi and looking for a partner in a threesome.” Or I’ll read newspaper personal ads, and will see “male seeks lesbian couple for fun times.” Now, WTF is that all about? Are there lesbians that really answer those sort of ads? The only way I’d see a lesbian couple doing that, was if they were trying to get pregnant and needed a sperm donor. But even then, more than likely they’d get a sperm donor, not get it from the real source.

But back to this threesome thing. What makes people want to sleep with other people, in front of someone they’re supposedly in love with? To me, it’s not like BDSM, where it’s a lifestyle, but to others it is. I guess people are able to disassociate themselves from their emotional feelings. I don’t see myself doing that. I’m the sort of person that’d be too afraid of what would happen. I’m a one woman kind of woman, and the idea of some other woman having sex with my partner while I watched, that just doesn’t turn me on at all. Nor does the idea of me having sex with someone I have no emotional attachments to, having sex with me while my partner watched. I just couldn’t do it.

Call me old fashioned, but I have the sort of belief that if I’m going to have sex with someone, we both have to be in love with each other on so many different levels. I couldn’t find that sort of love with someone I was having a threesome with. My heart belongs to only one person, and the thought of me giving myself to someone else in such an intimate way, that other person doesn’t deserve that form of intimacy from me. Some people are able to separate their own feelings of emotional love for sexual gratification. Sexual gratification is a great thing, but I don’t think I could see myself being with someone just for that specific thing.

Aside from the emotional feelings I’d be feeling, I’d be wondering “if this happens once, will my partner want to keep this up?” Or “will this 3rd person try to get in the way of our relationship.” Or even “what if I LIKED it?” I know that there are so many things to think about, when it comes to deciding whether to allow another person in the bedroom, but I just don’t feel like the pros would outnumber the cons. I just know it would add so many more complications to a relationship. But I guess for those people who do it, they’re looking for some new elements to their sex life. Maybe I’m prude or maybe I’m just too chicken sh*t to actually think about it. But my partner and I both are not into it, and I’m secretly grateful that my partner doesn’t bring it up.

All the more power to people who do decide to do this sort of thing, but it certainly isn’t my cup of tea. But like I said in the beginning, doesn’t deter me away from making friends (with lesbians) just as long as they don’t push their lifestyle or choices onto me. I discriminate with the bisexuals (and it may be a double standard) merely for the fact that many bisexual women I know, who are involved in this, are still married or have boyfriends. I don’t want any part in that. If there were ever to come a day where I WOULD participate in a threesome, it would strictly be a women only thing. Besides, I wouldn’t date a bisexual anyway (that’s for another day..lol) But I honestly can say, “not in this lifetime” would I get involved in a threesome.

-current mood-AVERAGE