First Impressions

Most of the time, I hate first impressions. I hate first impressions when it comes to real life, for the simple fact that one’s perception of me, always tends to be negative. Well, maybe not negative, but never positive. People have told me, when I asked them “what was your first impression of me” that I’m either 1) really shy or 2) a snob. My friends have told me this, and as much as I try to not come off across as such, I still manage to.

In college, I found it hard to make friends because people would look at me and assume I was in a soriority. I guess being in a soriority was a “bad thing.” I never was involved in one, but I do know they as an institution have this stigma of being snobs. I know I dressed well (in name brand clothing) and I kept to myself a lot. How can that be perceived as being snobby? Well, I guess I can understand how. But why do these first impressions have to stick? Of course, after my friends got to know me, they realized I wasn’t a snob, and that I definitely wasn’t shy. I know I sometimes give off the “leave me alone” vibe, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want friends or that I don’t want to converse with people. Do I have to wear a sign around my neck saying “I’m really an okay person to talk to?” No I know I don’t have to, but sometimes I just shake my head and think “I guess it’s their loss for not giving me a chance.”

That’s why I find it much easier to get along with people online. Most people “give” me a chance, thou I have had a few that seemed to not want to give me the time of day. Or they are in a bad mood, interpret something I say the wrong way and then lask back at me. People have to realize, being online and conversing online, so many things can be mis-construed and what I may be trying to get across to someone, it’s not what they’re interpreting it as. But I always seem to find myself apologizing to THEM for something that THEY misinterpreted. I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt, and if after explaining themselves to me, I still am not so sure, I’ll let them know. But I feel like you can’t base judgements on an individual based on one interaction.

But for the most part, I get along really well with people online. I’m pretty outgoing and I enjoy conversation. I find myself easily approachable and if people want to talk to me, they more than can. But nonetheless, people still find it hard to communicate with me…or maybe it’s hard to keep a conversation going? I know sometimes for me, I find it hard to keep up conversation, but if I really get along with someone, there is always going to be something to talk about. I just wish sometimes, that people in real life would give me more of a chance as the people online do. People online think I’m this great person (not trying to sound conceited, only trying to make a point) but when real life comes around and I try to make friends, I’m always struggling. I understand that I can’t get along with everyone, I just wish more people would give me the benefit of the doubt, that’s all.

First impressions are important, I’ve come to realize this. But why are they so important? Why are they so important when it comes to even developing a friendship with someone? First impressions in terms of a relationship is a whole different ball game and I much rather not delve into that at this moment. Is it human nature to be on your guard when it comes to be-friending someone else? And why are we all so prone to jumping to conclusions when someone says something (either verbally or written) It’s like we don’t want to give anyone else the chance to prove us wrong, so we automatically pass judgements on others. Maybe it’s not necessarily just passing judgements, but making your own assumptions based on what has been said or done. Does that mean we’re passing judgements? I don’t mean to cause a tiff with people, it’s definitely not my intention, but I always seem to tick someone off now and again. But hey, I guess I can’t please everyone now can I?

-current mood-FATIGUED